3

3:4/06 11:26

I approached my doorstep.

A man sprawled out face down, clearly not from here ; shoes gave him away.

Friends threw him away.

Like a seal on a rock he lay there, an island in a sea of pepperoni vomit.

Friends emerged after 3 calls. 1, a hang up. 2, an empty promise to come soon. 3, an agreement to leave the Little Darlings strip club to retrieve their seal.

I became invisible when they appeared.

Insisting he should eat his vomit, insisting it was only fair.

Boys will be boys.

Why did I expect anything?  A “thanks” or “sorry about our friend here…”

Finally, eyes met mine as I stepped over the flopping man. Words began pouring out, but he was not talking to me…

“You know she’s going inside to masturbate to this, right?”

2: 5/18 6:55

Planted on the corner of Pierce and Chestnut, blubbering to Mom on the phone.

“The most hilariously terrible awful day…”

“Isn’t it amazing? How incredibly coincidentally BAD today is? Isn’t it AMAZING!!!!”

Yes, I had lost it. I was aware.

A man appears before my eyes. Mid-forties, nothing peculiar about him.

He gestures to get my attention. He ignores my face that reads” I DO NOT WANT TO GIVE YOU MY ATTENTION.”

He begins to speak. ” Stop crying. You shouldn’t cry. Why are you sad? You don’t need to be sad… Don’t cry, pretty girl…” He ignores my request to

“PLEASE STOP TALKING. PLEASE. STOP.”

Thank you, sir. I feel so much better now.

1: 5/21 11:35

“Hey! Hey you there!” A silhouette in an old corolla. No, two silhouettes.

“I’ll give you 5,000! ”

“Hey honey! Slow down! I’ll give you 6,000!”

$$$.

Shame on us for wearing  dresses above our knees. Shame on us for dressing like such prostitutes.

 

 

 

Dare to Bare

An event takes place in San Francisco every once and a while, urging women to show up in sports bras and men to show up shirtless. They claim that women need to be “empowered” to show off whatever body they have, and that we should not be ashamed of our bodies or insecure of them.

Really? First of all, the fact that this even was sponsored by SoulCycle is ridiculous, accompanied by the fact that it took place in the Marina. How often do you see severely overweight people in the marina?

Exactly.

Soul Cycle’s audience is mostly young, in shape women and men. By saying that women should not be shamed out of wearing sports bras, you are shaming the women who do not feel comfortable taking their shirts off in a soul cycle class. You are not going to “solve” insecurity, and you especially aren’t going to solve it by taking your tops off and doing soul cycle on marina green. This is like Heidi Klum walking into my yoga class in a sports bra and bootie shorts and being like “Look at me! I am confident in my own skin! You should be confident too! Don’t be insecure about your body! Take your shirt off and be proud!”

Um…. no thank you.

This movement is a poor excuse to give women another idea of what we should be wearing and how we should feel about what we’re wearing. Dare to Bare, you now have a competing movement. It is called:

Dare to Wear Whatever the Fuck You Want Because It’s No One’s Business What You Decide is Comfortable for Your Own Body.

Too long?

I thought so. Damn.

 

I Know You Want It

Alright, alright. I know I’m late in the game on this one, but I just saw the “Blurred Lines” video for the first time and ohhhhhh my goodness. At the risk of sounding like an obsessive uptight feminist, that video made me so very uncomfortable, a little (a lot) bit angry, and quite humored at the outrageousness of it all.

Disclaimer: I will admit that this song is so very catchy and I will probably dance to it any time it is playing in my presence.

But, when I saw this video, particularly when I saw Robin Thicke’s creepy ass pervert stare-down of these models while whispering to them “I know you want it… you know you want it…”,  I couldn’t help but remember that time.

“I know you want it.” Well. I didn’t, sir. And I was able to push you away from me without any damage taking place, but it only took me saying, “no. no. NO.” for you to get the picture that, no, the lines are not actually blurred ,they are very clear. And for one in four women my age, the story has a much darker ending. Which is why, when I was shown this women’s parody of Thicke’s misogynistic debut, I was thrilled.

This video is the perfect reminder that we have agency, and with things like Youtube, we have more agency than ever before. We can all be heard, especially if we are clever enough to get our voices out there in an entertaining way. These women are not saying we should objectify men the way women are objectified- they are showing through this overly-exagerated video of men on leashes, etc, that the hyper-sexualized objectification in Thick e and Pharrel’s video is just as ridiculous.